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Still [Only] Human

Hey all, how’s everyone doing? Man… I don’t know if y’all saw that a few days ago, but I posted when I was intoxicated. You know there’s that little warning, do not operate heavy machinery while under the influence of alcohol or any other drug… yeah… my blog should be in included. After much deliberation, sober, I chose to take it down. Don’t worry; it’s not a post that is completely lost. I will be discussing it later tonight. It was about my retirement and I preferred it be presented in a more honorable manner, such a delicate situation deserves that.

Today, including tonight is all about being human. Someone once said to me... “Carl, are you sure you’re still human?” And I kinda laughed it off… but underneath it all it was like I was becoming a machine; like I was losing my humanity. I cannot be detached from a race that I’m trying to protect and better. I can’t lose being human. Clearly, I’m not divine so I need to prove that I’m not a machine. So here comes the question, can I change myself? Can I better myself? Even of the most advanced machines today cannot notice their own flaws and improve themselves. And that there is key, noticing one’s own flaws. How can you better yourself if you don’t know what you lack? Furthermore, how can I preach something that I don’t even do myself? And yes, there have been times where I was a particular way and I changed it. And along with many great human things, no one was available to witness it in its entirety. So, how do I lead by example when there is no example?

I, of course, already know the answer [or else I wouldn’t be here talking about it]. I feel as though I lack in the reading department. I don’t believe I’ve read enough; yes, I read books from class, but books from class don’t nearly cover as much as I should have read. And yeah, I read stuff about philosophy and about architecture, and I’m in tune with poetry and various amounts of literature. But I’m still lacking in the reading department. I don’t read enough, period; there’s no doubt about it. So to be more well-read, I am taking it upon myself to read more. It’s far easier to change oneself, than to change another. So instead of waiting for someone to make me read [like all those that have tried before], I am going to pick a book up on my own and lead by example. As this blog is a promise to me, and I don’t know how y’all can check on me, but I hope that you will begin to notice the change… hopefully references to novels and plays as well as music and movies will begin to appear. But wait, there’s more. It appears there’s an obligation from the audience.

Simply, I ask for material. How can I be well rounded without hearing from various sources? I have spoken to my closest avid readers and requested a comprehensive list, I hope this list varies as much as the character of these individuals I have asked. Even with this, it is not going to be enough. If you have a suggestion, please never hesitate to present it here. I wait with a willing mind and open hands.

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